How do you decide which #1 hits to include in your museum of bad songs?
This is a meta-critical effort, meaning that I evaluate the hit records based on other people’s opinions. I look at critical reviews, “worst song” lists, and Rate Your Music scores to identify records that are considered, by consensus, to be of well below average quality for their time and their genre. I try not to feature multiple songs by the same act, but I made an exception for Ray Stevens because he pulled off the unique feat of having a “bad” #1 as a novelty singer and a “bad” #1 as a serious singer. I may make other exceptions by the time I’m done.
My personal tastes are not much of a factor in choosing the songs, though my opinions are evident in the commentaries. I actually like many aspects of the supposedly bad #1 hits and defend them and the people who made them.
What are a couple of
examples of #1 hits that you considered including but did not?
Many people lose their cool when they hear “Don’t Worry Be Happy” or “We Didn’t Start the Fire”, but you can also find reviews that grudgingly respect these songs. There isn’t a consensus of awfulness for them. Besides, the late 1980s had a lot of other #1 hits that are far more deserving of being put on the “bad” list.
Why not write about
the best #1 hits instead of the worst?
Number one hits are supposed to be good, so it’s the lousy ones that are more intriguing. I’m always curious as to how songs reached the top if everyone hates them so much. If you would like something more positive, you can read an entry on my other blog about the best “Bubbling Under” songs that just missed the Hot 100 singles chart in the 1980s.
Why did you start
with 1960?
The Hot 100 began in the summer of 1958, but there weren’t any consensus terrible #1s for the first couple of years. The worst we had was “The Chipmunk Song” and a couple of tunes by Frankie Avalon, and I wasn’t motivated to write about any of those records. They were way before my time.
What qualifications
do you have to write about music?
None! I have no musical talent, and no training beyond childhood accordion lessons. I can’t tell an A-flat major scale from a glissando. But I have been paying attention to the Hot 100 for over 45 years and have listened to a lot of music. If you don’t like what I say here, start your own blog to rebut it!
What happens to this blog
when you’re caught up to the present day?
Probably nothing. I will leave it up for future generations to ponder, and will add indexes of the songs.
Can I read about the #1 hits in chronological order, with the oldest entries first?
Yes, and you probably should. It’s hard to make sense of James Blunt without knowing the context of his predecessors Milli Vanilli and Pat Boone. Click here to read the oldest entries, then use the “Newer Posts” link at the bottom of each page.
Where else can I read
your writing?
I have a blog on my main website where I publish other material, such as exposés of sleazy telephone spammers. I’m hoping for a Pulitzer for my articles on Midland Credit Management and Convergent Outsourcing.
I have also written four books that are available on Amazon in either Kindle or paperback format. These books are a little dated, and I don’t suggest that you buy them unless you have an intense interest in the subject matter. You can read them for free with a Kindle Unlimited subscription.
How do I contact you?
You can post comments on this blog, or send me a private message via the form on my other website. You can also reach me on Twitter / X. I have dozens of bots that follow me there, for some reason. Join the fun!